Column Scalamaris World – Three Friends Over Wine At The Table (And Love)

No wonder that I draw you very thin ice at serene 8 degrees on all. In a dark corner of the loyalty country behind the monogamy mountains on the Selbstbestimmtheits Avenue, where I found myself recently and it defined the heart of me neatly.

The subject melted and surfaced as a confession from friends of wine, that since many years – even during relations – is still a secret other somebody in the game. Someone, for which there has never been a socially from nickbare, official drawer. He is buddy, either fixed or best friend and we are more than affair. We see all the time and then again for weeks not at all. He is part of my life and I his, but it is only for us alone and silent, and Yes – also secretly.

Current romance, relationships and Affairs never knew about this #JemandohneSchublade, but I’ve still never felt even one second as a cheater. He was finally first. Even if therefore at least a page this was condemned to fall completely in the dark and to have an idea, nothing I never had bad guys over. Only once, a relationship that is long, I asked the Geheimjungen to break the contact between us. Why can’t I say exactly. Three were one too much.

The whole story has brought me to the following questions:

When self-determination is selfishness and when Arschlochismus’?

and many others:

Can I be not true?

We all may be not true?

Should we all be not true?

Faithful utopia is?

How much lying is loyalty?

Such as taboos and boundaries are important and for whom?

Monogamy is always both sides?

When it starts to be unfair?

Why not a man enough for me?

A person enough, if I really, really love?

As long as you’re doing well and you hurt any of this, they say it is true. Right?

Bigamy or Poligamie are the modern answer to the marriage?

Why I’m still jealous?

How would the world without the traditional model of marriage look like?

Where an open relationship ends and begins infidelity?

There is not always the one that determines and the other blends of?

Everything is a matter of our socio-cultural conditioning?

Is a desired corset lovers and belongs, together with a true love in the Museum?

And above all the simple question:

What is loyalty and who determines their definition?

And what equipment I want to tell you in stuttering voice and Declaration of emergency, so like there at the table among friends of?

And who see it that way:

Lotte is together since both live several years in a relationship, love each other, but regularly fly the sparks really – and she sleeps with me on the sofa. She is convinced that man can be created very well for “only” one person and also on both sides fall out. We are not wild animals after all and this whole evolution statement shit hinke and stink greatly and is a cheap excuse of suvidha which around like unatoned wanted to screw in the area.

Karl, however, is fresh separated from his friend in the good – and the marriage refers to an interview with Laurie penny which he explained by analogy, that it sucks for the people is again not easy to live – monogamous is still 50 years ago was that no love construct but rather a practical life community. At the moment at least the man has to rumgehuselt – all mention of earlier, the mistresses. Meanwhile, our understanding has but love completely changed – just stupidly the standards to not, marriage is subject to still have the same rules as before ages. That do it now for other relationship approaches and implementations of a feeling of togetherness.

Tjaha, super – and now? The ground cracks under me – maybe all cracks up soon. The question is, is the cow (I) then even by the ice? What do you think?